I'm reading a book that makes the case for not allowing your child to have sweets before they're two years old. (I haven't read the entire book yet, so don't consider this a wholehearted endorsement.) His claim is that your child learns their comfort foods before that age, and then they're rightfully suspicious of new foods after that - so if they're used to eating lots of healthy foods and green veggies at every meal, they won't be so crazy for processed sugary foods later on. He does note that our bodies are hardwired to like sweet foods, so it's not like they'll never eat them, but it's not like they'll refuse to eat anything but them.
We really like the concept of not giving Miriam any sweets before she's two... but is is really possible?
I asked my parents if they thought it was possible. My kind mother raised her eyebrows and said "Well, I think that would be challenging." My blunt father said "No. She's got to eat her grandma's chocolate chip cookies!"
And my father-in-law? Has recently taught his fiance's grandchildren to demand dessert after every meal. The four year old keeps asking for tiramisu.
Does anyone else get the feeling that the grandparents are going to be the hardest part of getting your kids to eat healthy?
Okay, I guess I could be part of the problem, too. I've got to curb my snacking. I recently was
Since I know it's not realistic to never have treats, I'm trying to figure out how to make healthy treats more appealing. I've decided those Sunsweet Ones are just the thing - individually wrapped prunes! It's like candy!
Okay, you might be rolling your eyes right now. But I've been buying them for a while, and it's starting to work on both my husband and me. He'll toss a few in his lunchbox, and when I'm trying to avoid temptation I'll pop one in. If we act like they're a yummy treat, surely she'll think they are, too. Right?
But I don't know that the trick-or-treaters will agree. I decided this year we should hand out a healthy snack. After all, if I'd like my daughter to receive something other than candy for Halloween, surely other parents would, too. So I announced to my husband that we would be distributing raisins for Halloween. And maybe we could get bouncy balls or some other cheap Oriental Trading junk that wasn't even edible. And he announced that we may as well just turn off our lights and not celebrate Halloween at all. Ahem.
So the candy basket at our house is now a compromise consisting of raisins, pretzals, Crunch bars and M&MS. What do you think we'll run out of first?
The other sweet I've been dreading? Birthday cake. I've worked so hard to make sure Miriam eats healthy foods for this first year, and the thought of suddenly giving her cake and (even worse) frosting just makes me cringe. I was racking my brain trying to figure out what to do. Do I make a cake with whole wheat pastry flour and cream cheese frosting? That would be a bit better, but let's be honest - whole wheat desserts are just not the same. Do I do that for an individual cake for her and make an unhealthy one for everyone else?
Finally I voiced my concerns to my husband, who had a great idea. Homemade ice cream sundaes! He'll make homemade vanilla ice cream - while it does have sugar, I feel much better knowing that the only other ingredients will be good quality milk and cream and vanilla. I'll make homemade chocolate sauce and brownies for the other guests to use with their sundaes. And we'll provide a variety of fruit for everyone to add. Giving Miriam a little ice cream topped with colorful bananas, strawberries, and blueberries will still seem festive, and it won't be quite so obvious that I'm turning into one of those crazy "my child can't eat that" mothers.
Confession: With all this talk of sweets, I just swiped a mini bag of M&Ms from the Halloween basket. It's naptime, so she doesn't have to know.
Okay, it was two bags.
My daughter is doomed.
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1. My attending last year was a pediatrician and he whole-heartedly believe you could 'program' kids to not prefer sweets. He said his neices and nephews were never given candy types of sweets but instead fruits and veggies as treats and now that they're older they prefer the healthier option. Same thing with pop vs. juice/milk/water.
ReplyDelete2. I don't have children but I've seen the way my parents spoil my dog and yes, I think getting the grandparents to cooperate will be the hardest. :)
5. I just wrote about that last week. My husband said we would get egged or no one would come next year if we didn't give out candy. We compromised with plastic vampire teeth and spider rings plus a little bag of Cheeto's. :)
Goodness, I just love sweets, and I'm going to have to do a better job of hiding that when the baby comes along, cause I'm sure not giving it all up. :-P
ReplyDeleteI think you can keep candy away easily under 2 due to choking worries, baked goods are a little tougher but could probably be limited to special occasions ~ pies at Thanksgiving, cookies at Christmas, etc. At least that was our approach ~ so Lisbeth now asks for cookies and candies but accepts when we say that those are not everyday treats ~ curious to see how we do with limited her Halloween loot.
ReplyDelete2-yes, yes, yes. more than you know yes!
ReplyDeleteHealthy eating, here's a story: when my daughter was about 5 or 6, she could taste the difference between olive oil brands on her salad. Now, as an adult, she refuses all home made salad dressings. Go figure, we tried, we really did. Her resaoning, "tastes change".
ReplyDeletejust remember - moderation is a virtue :)
ReplyDeleteits nice to have a treat once in a while, although i will say my kid never touched *CANDY* until past two. i mean, why would he need it? but bites of cakes and cookies? sure why not. he rarely at age 3.5 gets his "own" cookie or anything, just will share off of mine or someones.
i think its a good goal to have, but to be flexible about it in the sense that you dont want to avoid birthday parties or something just to not ever see a sweet thing.
also, for birthdays here, we do cupcakes. that way, its a manageable amount and both times? my one year old had the smushed up mess equivalent of 1 or 2 bites (ha! and my oldests was gluten free b/c someone at the party needed it. almost healthy! :-p)
i love the icecream idea tho!
I think you read too many books, my friend! :-)
ReplyDeleteI agree with some of the other commenters- when it comes to actual candy, most of it is a choking hazard for children under 2. But when it comes to other sweets- I believe moderation is key.
I think your daughter will be just fine when it comes to healthy eating habits because I'm sure you will be offering those healthy options and when she is old enough she will be running around playing. I think the problem with childhood obesity and weight problems is parents don't practice moderation with their kids and let them eat whatever they want and sit in front of the TV or video games all day. I have a very strong feeling that you won't be one of those lazy parents. :-)Your daughter will be just fine. Sure there might be a time that Joe will beg for a cookie, but I will just use that as a teaching opportunity that you can't always have what you want and that cookies are a special treat.
I wouldn't worry about it too much. ESPECIALLY about the birthday cake. Don't fret about it! She's not going to eat it and then turn to you with a sugar crazed face and start saying, "MORE CAKE NOW OR I WILL POOP IN YOUR CLOSET!!!" with frosting frothing out of her nose. She will love it, you will love seeing her enjoy the cake and that will be that! :-)
Just trust your gut! Miriam is so lucky to have a mama like you!
My daughter turns two next week and still doesn't eat sweets. I made mini cupcakes for her first birthday, and she refused to eat it. She pushed it away until I gave her tofu. My sister in law does it this way. . . There are foods that help us build muscles so we can do the things we want to do, like play. And then there are treats, and treats are for sometimes. It seems to be working so far. Did I mention that she is a registered dietician? For me, moderation allows for self control and still enjoying food. I could be saying that because I just finished eating a Carmel apple . . .
ReplyDeleteThe idea of waiting for sweets sounds really good, but I can see how it would be really hard to do! #7 cracked me up!
ReplyDeleteI have such a sweet tooth, and I vowed that Gus wouldn't get sweets early on, but so far I have not had nearly enough self-discipline. When he starts fussing due to my eating something delicious in front of him, I either try to find a healthier alternative, or, when that doesn't work, I give him one teeny-tiny bite. So he has had a bit of cake and chocolate, but the times are few and far between. For his birthday, I am going to make this cake: http://blog.fatfreevegan.com/2010/07/chocolate-blueberry-cake.html with whipped cream topping. I also saw this recipe: http://www.bamboofamilymag.com/b-blog/2011/5/4/baby-turns-1-no-sugar-birthday-cake.html but I thought a no-sugar cake might be a bit too mean. Plus, I am the one that is mainly going to be eating it, and I prefer the chocolate!
ReplyDeleteAlso, I love prunes, they are like candy! Gus loves them as well. Maybe there is hope for him yet!
I think Maggie's hit the nail on the head: moderation. I can't STAND the whole "give a child his own cake on the first birthday and let him dig into it" aesthetic. It just sends totally the wrong message. On birthdays, the baby gets a small sliver of cake and a bit of ice cream, proportional to what everybody else is getting. I know people will think I'm a big hoeey of a spoilsport, but I mean, why do we think it's so cute to have them with food in their hair and all over their faces? Trust me, my 4 1/2 year old STILL eats that way and it is NOT FUNNY. We have to yell at her constantly to use her utensils.
ReplyDeleteWe give desserts pretty regularly, but the kids have to eat the healthy stuff first. And if they don't, they don't get the sweets. I can see it being really good to keep them away from sweets altogether, but I don't know that it's a deal-breaker, either.
My kids know they get candy every sunday after church when all the old ladies scramble to give them a jelly bean or smarties. They don't get juice(to expensive) or pop (to unhealthy) and they happily drink plain old water out of their cups all day. We always have homemade from scratch cake and frosting on birthdays, they get a slice each and usually eat the frosting off first and hardly ever finish the whole piece. I always have homemade cookies on hand, and they think that cookies crammed with nuts, flax seed, honey and raisens are a treat. They adore fresh and dried fruit. I feel that by letting them taste anything, they learn to self regulate without ever feeling like they are missing out. And we don't have any cavities or abnormal sugar cravings happening yet.
ReplyDeleteOn halloween stuff, you could give out healthier candy like plain mini hershy's bars, or you could give out those mini bags of chips.
Great post! I agree with Kathleen about the individual cakes too!
ReplyDeleteOne way that we help moderate sweets in our house is that I just don't buy them. The only way anything sweet ends up in our house is if I bake it from scratch. So occasionally, I'll have some cookies around. I make cakes for birthdays, but other fruit and sugar for coffee you won't find anything else sweet in the house. Same goes for other "snacky" foods too--like chips, or chex mix. I usually make hummus, salsa or guacamole and will have carrot sticks, or other veggies around to snack or if we get hungry.
craisins aren't the worst thing in the world -- it's a serving of fruit and it's good for your urinary tract. prunes are also good.
ReplyDeletei think the main way to keep candy away from your kids is to just not have it in the house. the most evil thing i give my 2.5 year old is graham crackers. he also wants to eat whatever i eat so it's totally on me to model good eating habits.
My kids love dried mangos and the granola bars - along with raisins - those are some of their favorite treats. That being said, it is a lot more difficult to do that with kids who are not the oldest (for example, Ethan's preschool handed out weekly suckers last year and I quickly realized the poor kid would be a bit humiliated if I demanded he not get one when his entire class was picking theirs out ... and I didn't want to be 'that' mom. Also, make sure you don't communicate those foods are "bad" because that can really lead to a lot of disordered eating later on....just saying. In the end, it is all about balancing it out and doing what works best for your family and even if foods are sometimes foods, realize that all foods can have a place at one time or another.
ReplyDeleteI think its a good goal. We haven't completely cut out sweets, but for Jack cookies were graham crackers (for the most part) and he didn't have cake until his 1st birthday. We don't keep many sweets around so Jack knows that he can have cake at birthday parties (but only one piece). Moderation is really our goal...
ReplyDeleteHe just had his first taste of candy this Halloween and it was one piece then it all got put away while he was sleeping (for Mommy & Daddy, tee hee).
He did have a "friendship snack" day at preschool where we all sent a cup of the kid's favorite cereal with them & they made a party mix. I was appalled when Jack came home with a bag of fruit loops, lucky charms, etc. from a 2-year old class room! For the Halloween party we signed up to bring "candy" and sent individual goldfish snacks because I was so afraid he'd come home with ALL candy.
Its a battle, but I hope our focus on moderation helps our kids...
Frozen yogurt with fruit on it! Or... cocoa banana smoothies (with no sugar), presented as a milkshake.
ReplyDelete