7 Quick Takes (56) - Postpartum thoughts

1

All I think about is nursing. I was prepared to think about nothing but the baby... but it's not even that. I don't think much about her clothes or bathing her or taking pictures of her adorableness. I haven't even started writing her birth story. Almost every thought that goes through my mind is somehow related to feeding little Miss Miriam. I've almost written several posts all about the subject - except then I don't have time to because she's ready to eat again. It took me all week to come up with seven quick takes that weren't only about breastfeeding. I'm not really complaining here, just observing. I had no idea I would be so focused on nursing!

2

Another thing I didn't realize: I didn't know how much I'd worry before and celebrate after poop - both the baby's and mine!

3

How do you get a baby to actually sleep on her back? Miriam fusses within five minutes of being put down flat on her back, even if she was in a deep sleep. Please share your advice on the subject!

4

An update on my postpartum body: the good and the ugly.

The good: After gaining 38 pounds during the pregnancy, I was down to just ten pounds over my pre-pregnancy weight a week later, and seven over now. And this is actually my college weight, so even if I don't lose it, I won't feel all that bad!

The ugly: I've got some major stretch marks right in the middle of my belly! It's a good thing I already decided not to wear two-piece swimsuits for modesty's sake, or I might actually be disappointed. Instead I'll just brag about having the badges of motherhood. And refuse to show them to anyone.

5

Oh, and speaking of my body - my forearms are getting ripped from holding this baby. That and I feel like I'm getting carpel tunnel.

6

I made it through the first couple days home alone with the baby! Okay, in all honesty I cried three times on the first day, but one of those times was tears of joy that my husband was coming home early to help his poor overwhelmed wife. The two days after that were much better - no tears at all!

7

My husband is amazing! He cooks, he does all the dishes, he washes the diapers, he walks the baby around when she fusses, he waits on me hand and foot, he sends me to bed early and takes care of the baby until she's hungry again, he changes her in the middle of the night, he gets up early to take care of the baby so I can sleep a little longer, and then he goes to work on top of all that. I can't think of an adjective that is awesome enough to describe him. I mostly just thank God for him over and over.

Happy New Year!

A word of breastfeeding advice

Get it right from the get-go.

When the lactation consultant visits you in the hospital room, keep her there with you until you really feel like you have it right. Don't do what I did and mention that it hurts, hear her say that some pressure is normal, and tell yourself to just stop being such a wimp.

Because when you do that, you might end up with sore nipples, which turn into cracked nipples, which combines with some engorgement due to mismanaging potential oversupply, and eventually turns into mastitis.

On the bright side, Miriam is eating great and I swear she's getting heavier every day. And who can be in a bad mood when you have this looking at you?

Christmas card greetings

My mom took several pictures for us to use on our Christmas cards/birth announcements. They turned out pretty good!

And yet, my husband thought we should use the following picture instead, because it's more natural.

Yes, you can't get more natural than a four day old who pulled an all-night nursing marathon, parents who haven't showered in three days, and a dog who is so distraught over not being number one that she cries more than the baby. And yet, we do look awfully happy.

At least my husband previewed the card before I included the close-up of Miriam with part of my nipple in it. That would have been a little too natural.

Merry Christmas to all of you!

Things we didn't know about childbirth

Thank you so much for your congratulations and good wishes on the birth of our daughter! We are having a great time getting to know her. My main focus has been nursing, as it really hurt the first several days (we're talking toe-curling pain), but we're doing much better now that the lactation consultant has come to help. The sore and cracked nipples don't bother the baby at all, though, and she's feeding great!

I haven't had a chance to write out the birth story yet, but in a nutshell: I made it through 19 hours drug-free! Afterwards my husband and I were discussing it, and we realized that despite all of my research on the subject, there were a lot of things that we didn't know about labor! Here's what we came up with.

Things My Husband Learned About Childbirth:

• Books are nice, but you don't have any idea what labor is about until you see it.
• Even though the books say labor can be painless, it can't.
• Doctors can be accommodating for a natural birth, but afterwards they just want to get things done.
• Keeping a woman motivated through labor is tough! Make sure she eats and has enough rest before the hard labor begins.
• Pushing really is like pooping.

Things I Learned About Childbirth:

• There's something to be said for trying to induce naturally. We tried several things on Saturday and labor started that night! Coincidence? We'll never know.
• Just because all your mother's labors were short doesn't mean yours will be. It's best not to count on that or you'll be mystified as to why it's taking so long.
• Labor is painful. It's not that I really thought it would be painless. But I didn't realize just how much it would hurt once I made it to 7 centimeters. The good news is, the first stage really was more of just intense pressure but not actual pain. But transition and second stage really were painful. Just a heads up.
• A change in nurses can be a godsend. I was really dreading the shift change because I really liked my first nurse. But the second nurse was just what we needed: a no-nonsense lady who really helped us to get out of transition and into pushing.
• You really do just want it out. I was always a bit turned off when I heard women say things like "Just get it out of me!" And yet by the end of my labor I was desperately asking "Why isn't she out yet?!"
• How much blood there would be. It was everywhere afterwards! This was probably a bit worse in my case because I tore really bad.
• The pain doesn't necessarily end with the birth. Having your stomach mashed to get the placenta out and especially getting stitched up afterwards hurt. But at least you've gotten to hold your baby by then and you can watch your husband enjoying his first moments of fatherhood.

Is there anything about babies that you didn't (or couldn't) know until you experienced it?

Welcome to Planet Earth, Year 2010, Miriam Denise!

Miriam Denise was born on December 12, 2010 at 20:44 EST weighing 7 lbs and 9 oz and measuring 21.5 inches long. The mother and child are healthy and resting at the hospital and will return home Tuesday afternoon.

7 Quick Takes (55)

1

 I've come to the realization that I am just not a bath person. Anyone else with me on this? Every couple years I think to myself "Oh, a nice relaxing bath sounds good" and I try it. Then I get in the tub and wonder what the big deal about baths is. Yeah, bubbles are fun. But the tub is never big enough to completely immerse yourself, so there's always some part of your body that's cold while the rest is warm. And I get bored. Am I missing something here?

2

I FINALLY went through and organized my whole email account. This has been weighing on me for months now, and it feels soo good to have it completely done! Seriously, it is such a weight off my shoulders to know that there are no forgotten emails awaiting a reply or to see over 2000 emails sitting in my inbox (thank you, gmail archive feature). I'm also unsubscribing from retail email lists and whatnot as they come, and that's a relief as well.

So if you received a reply from me on something you had written weeks ago, that's why. And if you maybe made a blog comment that asked a question and I wanted to reply to it, I probably tried to email you, realized you didn't provide an email address anywhere on your blog or profile, assumed you wouldn't go back to check the comments on the old post, and so did not reply. All that to say, please include an email somewhere on your blog so I can get back to you! You can make a separate email from your personal one so easily!

3

Comment from my husband to my belly: "It's really not that great out here. BUT we have a dog!"

4

I have resigned myself to the fact that this baby is going to be late (she's officially due Monday). My husband is appalled by this. He thinks that I am in denial that the baby will ever come and that if I just think positively, she will come - probably today or tomorrow. I on the other hand am pretty sure that I am just being practical and (for once) patient - I need to save my energy and enthusiasm for the labor itself, whenever that is! I can't be wasting all my adrenaline before it's the real thing!

5

However, my husband the scientist is much more observant than I, so it wouldn't surprise me too much if he was right on the baby coming soon. Last night he was touching my stomach and we discovered that my uterus was actually contracting, and fairly regularly, though it didn't really feel like anything. They say you have Braxton Hicks contractions all the time throughout your pregnancy but just don't necessarily notice them. Apparently that's the case with me right now. Which is fine with me - I told my uterus to do all the work it can now before the "real" labor begins!

6

How important is it to get an official car seat check? Is it enough that the car seat is in really tight and not wobbly? I'm having a heck of a time finding a checkpoint near us (the closest official ones are all a good half hour away). Every place I call tells me to try a different place - from the car shop to the fire department to the police station to the hospital. I'm getting tired of calling places and am not sure this is going to get done before the baby arrives, so please assuage my guilt and tell me it's no big deal. Unless of course it is.

7

What should I know about a Catholic baptism? And perhaps more pressingly, what should I know about the party afterwards? My biggest question is, do we have to serve a full meal? The baptism is at 1:00 so we were planning to just have a cake and punch reception. Is that considered acceptable, or does etiquette dictate that we need to serve lunch?

For more quick takes, visit Jen at conversiondiary.com.

Have a great weekend everyone! Hopefully the next time you hear from us, there's a baby here or on her way!

Is blogging anonymity important?

I just can't make up my mind about whether or not to use our full real names on here. I'm leaning more and more towards thinking it's no big deal at all, since it's not like we're badmouthing anyone or revealing any deep dark secrets. It's not like it's hard to discover our names anyway, and that would be better branding for any eventual writing I'd like to do, etc. But this one little part of me has an irrational fear that the instant I reveal our daughter's name to the world, some wacko out there will start stalking us. Ridiculous, right?



On his part, my husband still likes the idea of using pseudonyms from the Cosby Show. But I would hate to start calling our daughter Sondra if her personality turns out to be more of a Denise or Vanessa or Rudy. And what if we had multiple boys - what do we call them after we use Theo?


Clearly I've spent too much time thinking about this and I need a sensible second opinion.


Why did you choose to use your real name or a pseudonym? Do you wish you had somehow done it differently?

You know you're at the end of your pregnancy when...

• You decide that any weight gained in the last two weeks doesn't count, and eat accordingly.
• Your husband carefully analyzes your belly every morning and evening to determine if and how much it's dropped.
• While you were a bit annoyed by being treated like an invalid at the beginning of the pregnancy, you're now appalled if you aren't pandered to. Did that grocery bagger really just walk away when I got in line?!
• At the library you completely skip the pregnancy books, barely skim the childbirth books, and actually check out the postpartum books.
• You can't think of anything else to blog about.
• Putting on your shoes and socks counts as your daily exercise.
• All your shirts have stains on the belly from toothpaste or dinner.
• People ask when you're due and you respond in number of days.
• Every morning your husband asks if the baby's coming that day.
• You discover the older ladies at daily mass are placing wagers on the baby. They're hoping the Feast of the Immaculate Conception (tomorrow) or Our Lady of Guadalupe (Sunday), and you hope they're right, because then she would be early!
• Even though you're really ready for the baby to arrive, you're trying to think of ways to stall an induction when if she's late.
• You and your husband have seriously discussed trying the, ahem, natural ways to induce the baby.
• The prenatal exercise class you had thought was so easy is now quite a workout.
• Heck, just getting up from the couch and going to the bathroom leaves you huffing.
• You can no longer count the number of times you wake up at night.
• Your belly peeks out from your maternity clothes.
• You vow to never laugh at another woman's cankles again.
• Despite all of this, when people ask if you're sick of being pregnant, you're shocked that they would even think of such a question.

What would you add to this list?

7 Quick Takes (54)

1

I can hear and feel the baby squish when I bend over too far! Sorry sweetie - Mommy's gotta get her socks on! I assure you it's a hard process for both of us.

2

I hear that you lose a lot of hair after the baby arrives. Can I just say that I hope this includes chin hair? I feel like one of the three little pigs. I'm going to start answering all negative questions with "Not by the hair of my chinny chin chin!"

3

We've decided not to tweet the birth. I know you're all so disappointed. I am not :)

4

By noon today I will have finished all the shopping I could possibly need to do for the next two months. The goal is to not set foot inside a store (besides for groceries) until February!

5

I'm finished with our homemade Christmas gifts! I ended up making fewer than I originally planned, but I'm pretty happy with how they turned out. I made aprons for some women, fleece vests for some men, and these fun luggage tags and matching handle wraps for some frequent fliers (flyers?).

If anyone is interested, I'd be glad to share how to make the luggage accessories. Also, if anyone has a suggestion on how to sew on the plastic part without it looking terrible, I'd be really happy for the help!

6

How about a few links today? There were a couple articles lately on the topic of contraception. First, here's an interesting secular piece that actually questions the pill in New York Magazine. (H/T Faith and Family Live.)

Then, the Pope said WHAT about condoms??? I know it's been a week and most of the hullabaloo has died down, but just in case you didn't catch it, the pope didn't actually change 2000 years of Church doctrine. (You had to know the story was twisted when you saw the headlines, right?) Here's an explanation of what Pope Benedict actually said, and here are two follow-ups.

7

While I'm sharing links, here's a nice soapbox piece about NFP and discernment from Sarah at Fumbling Toward Grace. And here's a great post by Kaitlin at More Like Mary, More Like Me about the importance of knowing your friend's parents - particularly Jesus' mother.

For more quick takes, visit Jen at conversiondiary.com.

Have a great weekend everyone!

Should we tweet the birth?

I'm rather indifferent to Twitter. I don't know much about it, and figure it's just another internet time-sucker that I should avoid. My husband the scientist has looked down on Twitter from its inception, sure that it's just another fad that will rise and fall.

That's why I was shocked when he suggested that we TWEET THE BIRTH OF OUR BABY! Did I say shocked? Make that floored, stunned, astounded, flabbergasted. I would have fallen over if I wasn't already lying on the couch.

Mr. Anti-Twitter wants to get a Twitter account? Mr. Don't-Say-Too-Much-About-Our-Private-Lives-On-The-Internet wants to share all the intimate details of our firstborn child's birth? Mr. We're-Only-Calling-Your-Parents-Once-When-We-Go-To-The-Hospital-And-No-One-Else wants to give a play-by-play of the labor and delivery to the world? I tried to wrap my mind around this.

"I just think it'd be a creative way to share the birth story," he explained.

While I agree that it would be creative and even fairly interesting, I'm just not so sure that this is something I'm up for. On his part, my husband did agree that it would probably only be fun during the early stages of labor, before it got really hard. I'm pretty sure it won't happen, if for no other reason than we don't have fancy phones that connect to the internet, so it would be a bit difficult logistically.

But just for fun, we decided to turn to you all and ask your thoughts on the matter. Would you be interested in reading a birth story on Twitter as it happened? Would you ever tweet the birth of your own child?